Cliche post right? It’s so broad of a term that you can’t pinpoint how to use it. It’s 11 pm in my little Texas town. My three boys are spending the night with their grandparents and my husband is passed out beside me. But I’m no where ready to sleep.

Yesterday while we were casually hanging out in our living room, my body finally gave in. From what Eric told me, he was able to catch me and did his best to wait for my episode to pass. It’s been 5 1/2 months since my last seizure. I have been soaking up the summer with the boys, going to my part time job & it felt amazing to have the little bit of freedom I was granted. And in an instant, it was taken away.

The idea of going back to a full time job was something I kept telling Eric I couldn’t wait to do and I can’t even do that anymore. I don’t think that’s the worst part, let’s be honest it could be a lot worse. I guess the frustration is that I feel like such an inconvenience. I’m happy we moved to our small town to be closer to the boys school and closer to my family, but I hate having to ask for a ride to work or to take me to get groceries. It just wasn’t how it was supposed to be. Being on my own since 17 means taking help at 26 is not an easy task.

But tonight as I’m anxiously awaiting for my doctor visit tomorrow, I’ll take the fact that I have the help I have to go forward with this being a minor setback. And that I need to get back to my semi keto lifestyle. I. Not giving in to epilepsy. Positive vibes only.